Identity Archives | Bridge of the Faithful

Building Deep Roots with Little habits with Christie Thomas

November 15, 2021 by Jenna No Comments

Bridge of the Faithful

Building Deep Roots with Little habits with Christie Thomas

00:00 / 31:50

Related Episodes: Raising Kids in a New Generation with Bethany Adkins, Discovering Wisdom from the Moms of the Bible with Sharon Wilharm, Secret Confessions of a Mom who Wants to Quit, Planting Scripture in Young Children with Julie Parido, Transitional Motherhood with Meg Glesener, Identity and Idols in Motherhood with Merritt Onsa, Making Marriage the Priority in Motherhood with Glori Winders, Being a Special Mom of Special Needs Kids with Julie Holmquist, Surviving as a Single Mom with Annie Quinnell, Restoring Joy in Motherhood with Winfree Brisley, The No Judgment Zone: Honest Motherhood with Becky Kopitzke, Anchored Motherhood with Tina Smith, The Fight for Relationships , J esus: The Rest in our Busy, Identity: What You’re Not, Identity: Unveiled

Life for Christie has not gone in the trajectory that she originally planned. Originally she was a college student studying science, but God directed her toward children’s ministry and helping parents build a firm foundation of faith in their children’s lives. Her most recent endeavor has been the Mother-Son Prayer Journal, where she dug deep in understanding God’s faithfulness throughout the chronological life of David. Along the way, she learned so much about his life and the trustworthiness of God’s promises.

As a mom herself, Christie has learned that making God a priority always reaps good fruit. However, she also realizes that as a mother, life will not always look structured and picture-perfect. She has learned to do things in the timing that she’s given and to give herself grace, God will always bless her effort!

A big thing Christie learned in her study of David’s life was that no matter if he was in the high of his faith or the valley of disobedience, God proved that He is always faithful.

Psalm 34:1-8 – I will extol the Lord at all times;
    his praise will always be on my lips.
²I will glory in the Lord;
    let the afflicted hear and rejoice.
³Glorify the Lord with me;
    let us exalt his name together.

⁴I sought the Lord, and he answered me;
    he delivered me from all my fears.
⁵Those who look to him are radiant;
    their faces are never covered with shame.
⁶This poor man called, and the Lord heard him;
    he saved him out of all his troubles.
⁷The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him,
    and he delivers them.

⁸Taste and see that the Lord is good;
blessed is the one who takes refuge in him.

Resources:
www.littleshootsdeeproots.com
Quinn Books
Mother Son Prayer Journal
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChristieThomasLittleShoots
Instagram: @Christie.Thomas.Writer

Operation Christmas Child: The Story of a Child with Yulia Shubina

October 18, 2021 by Jenna No Comments

Bridge of the Faithful

Operation Christmas Child: The Story of a Child with Yulia Shubina

00:00 / 38:34

Yulia Shubina grew up in Central Asia in an area closed to the Gospel. However, through miracles and hard work, she received a Christmas Box at the age of 9 through Samaritans Purse. In that beautiful purple plastic box (which she still has 20 years later), she was delighted with beautiful new toys and supplies and heard for the first time of a loving God through another little girl who gave her a note telling her so. This box was the seed of a 7-year journey that led Yulia to salvation.

Operation Christmas Child sends millions of boxes to children worldwide to supply needs, fun surprises, and most of all the knowledge of a God who loves them and gives hope. Yulia is one of many who have grown to know Jesus as her personal savior through the wonderful sacrifice of families willing to send them gifts. Yulia has a wonderful story that helps us see an intimate view of what God can do through a Christmas box. “Because when God is involved, there is always more.”

Revelation 3:20 – Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me.

Resources:
Build a Box online, Click HERE!
Operation Christmas Child: https://www.samaritanspurse.org/what-we-do/operation-christmas-child/
What to Put in a Box: https://www.samaritanspurse.org/operation-christmas-child/pack-a-shoe-box/

Finding Hope and Faithfulness after an Inconceivable Accident with Jen Eikenhorst

October 4, 2021 by Jenna No Comments

Bridge of the Faithful

Finding Hope and Faithfulness after an Inconceivable Accident with Jen Eikenhorst

00:00 / 32:38

Jen Eikenhorst has experience as a C.A.D.I. – causer of accidental death or injury. One fateful night, she was involved in a tragic accident that caused the death of a motorcyclist. This accident sent her down a path of depression and questioning. In one moment all of her relationships, life plans, and faith changed. When trying to find support for this kind of trauma, she found that there were really no support groups for people on her side of the accident.

Obviously, this even changed how she thought about herself. She had to “come back to the place of learning who God says I am,” and learn to hear her shepherd’s voice over the lies. True to God’s faithfulness, He proved that He could still use her in big and impactful ways through her ministry and podcast Accidental Hope.

People began to notice the hope that Jen was radiating and cultivating with fellow C.A.D.I.s and was even featured in a New York Times article discussing this topic. Her passion in life is to free people from the bondage of guilt and shame related to their accidents, to remind them that God is still good and did not choose this situation for them, and above all: that there is ALWAYS hope when God is involved, even in the darkest of places.

2 Timothy 1:7 – For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.

Resources:

Podcast: Accidental Hope
Facebook: Accidental Hope
Instagram: @accidentalhope
Accidental Impacts: www.accidentalimpacts.org

An Honest Discussion on Mom Guilt with Take Heart

August 23, 2021 by Jenna No Comments

Bridge of the Faithful

An Honest Discussion on Mom Guilt with Take Heart

00:00 / 55:26

Related Episodes: Secret Confessions of a Mom who Wants to Quit, Planting Scripture in Young Children with Julie Parido, Transitional Motherhood with Meg Glesener, Identity and Idols in Motherhood with Merritt Onsa, Making Marriage the Priority in Motherhood with Glori Winders, Being a Special Mom of Special Needs Kids with Julie Holmquist, Surviving as a Single Mom with Annie Quinnell, Restoring Joy in Motherhood with Winfree Brisley, The No Judgment Zone: Honest Motherhood with Becky Kopitzke, Anchored Motherhood with Tina Smith, The Fight for Relationships , J esus: The Rest in our Busy, Identity: What You’re Not, Identity: Unveiled

Amy Brown, Carrie Holt, and Sara Clime are all special needs moms, and they are no strangers to mom guilt! With diagnoses ranging from behavioral disorders to terminal illness of their children, they’ve had to learn to find the balance of the everyday family needs, extra therapies, and appointments, to realizing that they just can’t do it all.
One major point that we all need to learn to believe is that God does not tack guilt on us. Jesus states that he didn’t come to condemn us, but Satan tries to keep us from that truth and steal God’s redemptive power in our lives. As moms, we tend to tell ourselves our failure stories over and over again. However, when we learn to focus on the truth and our true value and identity as the moms that God chose specifically for our families, we will finally be able to allow God to walk us through our mom guilt and into the peace that God has overcome it all.

John 16:33 – “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

Resources:

Take Heart website: https://takeheartspecialmoms.com/
Take Heart podcast
Take Heart Facebook Page
Take Heart Instagram

Amy J Brown website: https://www.amyjbrown.com/
Amy’s Facebook
Amy’s Instagram

Carrie M. Holt website: https://carriemholt.com/
Carries’ Facebook
Carrie’s Instagram

Sara Clime’s website: https://saraclime.com/
Sara’s Facebook
Sara’s Instagram

Identity and Idols in Motherhood with Merritt Onsa

June 14, 2021 by Jenna No Comments

Bridge of the Faithful

Identity and Idols in Motherhood with Merritt Onsa

00:00 / 43:11

Related Episodes: Marriage Marriage the Priority in Motherhood with Glori Winder, Being a Special Mom of Special Needs Kids with Julie Holmquist, Surviving as a Single Mom with Annie Quinnell, Restoring Joy in Motherhood with Winfree Brisley, The No Judgment Zone: Honest Motherhood with Becky Kopitzke, Anchored Motherhood with Tina Smith, The Fight for Relationships, J esus: The Rest in our Busy, Identity: What You’re Not, Identity: Unveiled

Merritt Onsa’s journey to motherhood was unconventional. After bouts of infertility, she and her husband decided to pursue embryo adoption (check out an episode here on this as well). Like many mothers who have been through infertility, she entered this part of her life with expectations and hopes of how motherhood would look. Of course, it hasn’t quite gone that way. Like all women, and especially moms, she has learned that she needs to work on finding her true identity as well as identify her idols in motherhood. God has been so gracious in that and reminded her that she doesn’t have to measure her motherhood by anyone else’s. God has His own plan for hers and yours.

Merritt is passionate about helping women find their God-shaped dreams. Please note: she does not say God SIZED but God SHAPED. That includes finding our identity, God’s purpose in our lives, and help give us the tools to achieve them. Merritt believes in you and loves to remind you that God promises to finish the work that He began in us. Look below for her resources!

Zephaniah 3:17 – The Lord your God is with you,
    the Mighty Warrior who saves.
He will take great delight in you;
    in his love he will no longer rebuke you,
    but will rejoice over you with singing.

Resources:
Website: https://www.merrittonsa.com/
Podcast: The Devoted Dreamers Podcast
Facebook: @merritonsa
Instagram: @merrittjo

Surviving as a Single Mom with Annie Quinnell

April 19, 2021 by Jenna No Comments

Bridge of the Faithful

Surviving as a Single Mom with Annie Quinnell

00:00 / 28:07

Relate Episodes: Restoring Joy in Motherhood with Winfree Brisley, The No Judgment Zone: Honest Motherhood with Becky Kopitzke, Anchored Motherhood with Tina Smith, The Fight for Relationships , J esus: The Rest in our Busy , Identity: What You’re Not , Identity: Unveiled

Annie had what she thought was a good life: married with two beautiful girls, until one day “a bomb went off” in her soul. After her husband left, Annie struggled with trying to adjust to life as a single mom. Her biggest torments were juggling time (in attempts to do the tasks of two people) and financial issues. While part of her longed to feel valued and loved by another man, she learned that you can’t get your value from a person, you have to get it from within, knowing who you are in Christ. After surviving through the teen years, learning how to do things one step at a time, her daughter suggested how she had a lot to give in terms of helping other single moms get through. That conversation ignited her passion to mentor other single moms, to make sure they truly believe that they don’t have to do this alone. All of her wisdom comes from the God who gave her the gift of children, and her heart’s desire is to honor God with the gifts He gave her.

Romans 8:28 – And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Resources:
Website: www.themamamentor.com
Podcast: The Unstoppable Solo Mom
Facebook: The Mama Mentor

Infertility is Never the End of the Story

October 19, 2020 by Jenna No Comments

Bridge of the Faithful

Infertility is Never the End of the Story

00:00 / 22:52

According to the CDC, approximately 13% of women between 15-44 years of age suffer from issues affecting fertility, ranging from endometriosis, PCOS, to the unknown.
- I was blown away after polling my Facebook friends, I had never realized how many brave people were facing it and willing to raise their hands. I know that there are many more out there that are afraid to talk about it.
This episode is dedicated to those people struggling to understand why, feeling “less than,” or having an identity crisis through this journey. You are all important to God, the one who carries you through who made you, who knows you and loves you more than you could ever understand.
How do I know? Because I’ve had my own journey in the lonely and painful land. For over three years (which I realize is not as long as some of you) I wrestled with all of these issues, including keeping a journal as I dealt with my anger and grief.
- The words of my journal are not easy to share. They show a lot of the ugly that God needed to deal with (and still does).
- However, God grabbed my heart and reminded me that He’s got this.
Infertility is not a subject that is ignored in the Bible:
- Sarah (wife of Abraham)
  - Genesis 12 God promised Abraham that he would be “the father of many nations” and “extremely fruitful.”
  - There was a waiting period. The promise was not fulfilled until we get to Genesis 21, 25 years later. God does not shy away from letting us know about the wait.
  - Sarah made mistakes during the waiting period, losing hope, and forgetting the promise.
    - But God still kept His promise.
    - God’s faithfulness does NOT depend on ours.
- Rebekah (wife of Isaac)
  - Genesis 25:21 – Isaac pleaded with the LORD on behalf of his wife, because she was unable to have children. The LORD answered Isaac’s prayer, and Rebekah became pregnant with twins.
  - Isaac and Rebekah traveled through 19 years of infertility because they had their sons.
  - Isaac was more patient: he had seen God answer these prayers first hand. He was the answer to one of these prayers.
  - Our God is generous.
    - Isaac pleaded for a child. He got double that.
    - Psalm 23:5 – You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You honor me by anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings.
    - John 3:16 – For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.
    - God’s blessings and promises are extravagant.
- Leah and Rachel (wives of Jacob)
  - This story is interesting because it includes the competitiveness of these women, something we all deal with today.
- - Genesis 30:1 – When Rachel saw that she wasn’t having any children for Jacob, she became jealous of her sister. She pleaded with Jacob “give me children, or I’ll die!”
    - It seems dramatic, but we’ve all been there, right?
    - Rachel knew the pain of infertility, and the Bible doesn’t shy away from that.
  - When we give in to the lie that our value and worthiness depends on our fertility, it changes our outlook and our choices.
    - In this story, it began a war between sisters, seen in Genesis 30. Between the lines, you can see there was hostility, pride, fighting, and bragging mixed in and fueled by the pain.
    - Rachel gave her maid to Jacob to get sons.
    - Leah did the same when she stopped having children.
    - Despite the competition and tension ruling this house, God was still working.
  - The naming of children is incredibly important in the Old Testament. They were either chosen to commemorate something (like Isaac, based on the laughter of Sarah) or as a declaration of God’s faithfulness like Samuel (see further down).
    - After giving her servant to Jacob, Rachel names the child Napthali. Genesis 30:8- “I have struggled hard with my sister, and I am winning!”
    - God worked in Rachel’s heart and answered her prayers. She named her son. Genesis 30:22-24 “God has removed my disgrace,” she said. And she named him Joseph, for she said “May the LORD add yet another son to my family.”
      - The name Joseph means “he will add.” In the time between Napthali’s birth and the birth of Joseph, Rachel was able to see God’s love and promises, and know that she could declare that He had more in store for her.
  - Tamar (daughter in law of Judah)
    - This marks the 4th generation of infertility in this family. It is definitely not conventional.
    - Genesis 38 gives us this juxtaposition story.
      - Tamar was married to Judah’s oldest son. He died before they had children, so his brother was obligated to give them a son. He refused, prevented her from getting pregnant, and he died as well. Afraid that she was a curse, Judah sent her away.
      - Tamar was forced to take things into her own hand, pretended to be a prostitute, and had relations with Judah.
      - This resulted in her becoming pregnant with twins.
      - This story is told in the middle of the story of Joseph in Egypt. Both Tamar and Joseph did nothing wrong but were blamed and punished for it. Judah and Potiphar’s wife were both inadvertently used by God turning their selfishness into blessing the entire world.
      - God is simultaneously able to give justice AND grace.
        Psalm 89:14- Righteousness and justice are the foundation of your throne; steadfast love and faithfulness go before you.
        Hebrews 4:16 – So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God.
        These are NOT contradicting verses. These are two facets of the character of God- He is both just AND merciful. He makes wrongs right while also being completely gracious.
        Jesus is the ultimate fulfillment of both God’s just making right the wrong of all our sins) and God’s mercy (grace toward us, His beloved creation).
  - Hannah
    - In Samuel 1, Hannah goes to the closest place she can get to God: the temple. She prays so fervently that Eli the priest thinks that she is drunk! In this prayer, she begs God for a son. She doesn’t stop there though, she tells God that she will dedicate her child completely to Him.
    - She names her son Samuel, meaning “God heard.”
    - Samuel became the prophet anointing Saul and David to be the kings of Israel.
  - Manoah’s Wife
    - Judges 13 tells a story about a man named Manoah and his wife. The Angel of the Lord visits her, telling her that she will bear a son and that he is to be set apart.
    - This son was Samson (as in Samson and Delilah), who had the famous strength and hair.
    - Samson ended up killing thousands of Philistines and therefore giving the Israelites a huge victory.
  - The Shunamite Woman
    - 2 Kings 4 tells the story of the Elisha and the Shunamite woman.
    - This woman built on to her and her husband’s house just so Elisha would have a room when he visited their area.
    - When Elisha asked her what he could give her to repay, she didn’t ask for anything.
    - Elisha’s servant realized that she didn’t have a child, so he suggested this as a blessing.
      - She was so afraid of the hope of having a child that she couldn’t even bear the idea of that conversation.
    - She did end up having a son, who ended up dying while still young.
      - She ran straight to Elisha. 2 Kings 4:28 – “Did I ask you for a son, my lord?” she said. “Didn’t I tell you, ‘don’t raise my hopes?'”
      - This woman was often afraid to speak her hopes and desires in fear of the pain that would come. if God did not grant them.
      - Despite her fears to actually voice her hopes, she knew that she could go to the place that God proved to her that He knows her heart and cares about what she holds in it. She knew she could fully trust God to know what she wasn’t able to let go of and that He could do something with that pain.
  - Elizabeth
    - Luke 1 tells us the story of Elizabeth, the wife of Levitical priest Zechariah.
    - Luke 1:6- Both of them were righteous in the sight of God, observing all the Lord’s commandments and decrees blamelessly.
    - In the culture of this time of history, physical ailments such and infertility were considered to be a consequence of sin. The above verse proves that this was not the case.
    - Later, when Jesus was healing a blind man, he explains in John 9:3- “neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.”
    - Gabriel the angel announced to Zechariah that Elizabeth would give birth to a son and name him John. However, due to their age, Zechariah did not believe and therefore lost his ability to speak.
      - Despite Zechariah’s unbelief, God was still faithful to His promise.
    - When Elizabeth heard the prophecy she said in Luke 1:25 – The Lord has done this for me,” she said. “In these days he has shown his favor and taken my disgrace among the people.”
      - There has to be so much behind this quote. There was so much shame being childless, especially in their higher position as priest and wife. There were likely lots of comments both privately and to her face. We all know how that feels.
  - Mary
    - I realize her story is not exactly infertility, but it is still a story of God’s victory and power over our fertility, no matter how impossible the situation may seem.
God knows that we live in a fallen world and meets us in that, all while doing whatever it takes to move us toward restoration.
- In the book Grace Like Scarlett, Adriel discusses her pain of miscarriage. In it she says “I wanted to linger in the romance, believing perfection was within my reach. But seeing the lifeless ultrasound screen was a stark reminder that we still live. in the tensions between now and not yet. Jesus has come but he is still coming. Restoration has drawn near but it’s still approaching. Heaven is at hand but it’s still descending. Every tear will be wiped away but for now, we still have a reason to cry.”
- I’m not sure where you find yourself in this story. But no matter where you are, INFERTILITY IS NEVER THE END OF THE STORY.
- In the book Surprised by Motherhood, Lisa-Jo Baker tells a story about a man who randomly came up to her and said “God wants you to know that whether you have children or not, He loves you for you.”
- Every time I look at these stories of infertility, I see God preparing to show Himself in a big way. And in all of it, He is showing you that He loves you for you.
- God has proven Himself victorious 100% over these fractures of His original conception of our world.
- Infertility was NOT the end of the story for Sarah, Rebekah, Rachel, Leah, Tamar, Hannah, Monah’s wife, the Shunamite woman, the mother of Samson, Elizabeth, Mary, and it will not be the end of the story for you.
- I am NOT promising that you will have children. I am NOT promising that if you have children you will suddenly be fulfilled and life will be perfect.
- What God does promise is Ephesians 3:20-21 – Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations for ever and ever. Amen!
I know it is hard to wait, that there is pain, doubt, despair, and so many questions.
- There is so much more. And God absolutely and abundantly holds that “more” for you victoriously in His hands.
- God has proven that He is faithful over infertility time and time again. Infertility never has and never will be the end of the story.
Romans 5:3-5 – Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character, and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

Racial Reconciliation: An Interview with Faith Mamas

June 13, 2020 by Jenna No Comments

Bridge of the Faithful

Racial Reconciliation: An Interview with Faith Mamas

00:00 / 1:11:22

Our world has been through a lot in 2020 (I think that’s the understatement of the century). First, we had the COVID Crisis; and then here in America, a palpable change in racial tension. After my last episode The Next Right Thing, I realized that my next right thing was to LISTEN. I wanted to give you that opportunity as well. I met with the amazing women of Faith Mamas, who graciously and bravely gave their time and their words to describe their experiences with racism, racial reconciliation, identity, and the faithfulness of our God even in uncertain times like these.

The questions of this conversation include:
- What are your favorite things about African American Culture?
- Define racism. What has it looked like in your life?
- Building a strong identity is pivotal to seeing our true value through Jesus. Describe how racism has affected how you view your value as a person. How has God helped you grow from that?
- What are some ways for people to show respect to African American people and culture?
- As a parent, how can we help our children grow up to defend, love, and respect all ethnicities well?
- In our world’s climate, there is so much lost hope right now. What examples of hope has God provided for you in this time?
- Despite all of the horrible things happening right now, is God still faithful? How has He shown that faithfulness to you?

2 Timothy 1:7 – For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.

1 John 4:7 – Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.

Luke 10:27 – And he answered, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself.”

The Fight For Relationships

December 15, 2019 by Jenna No Comments

Bridge of the Faithful

The Fight For Relationships

00:00 / 23:20

I am not a relationship expert. This episode is not meant to give relationship advice, but to change your perspective of relationships.
To be on the same page, the definition I’m using for relationship is: The way two or more people or groups regard and behave toward others. These relationships range from romantic, family (close family and extended), friends, coworkers, to the waiter you always get at your favorite restaurant.
Genesis 2:18- Then the LORD God said “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.”In all of His creating, man being alone is the first time that God said: “It is not good.”
- We are not meant to live life alone, tucked away, isolated. We are such independent people, but the one thing we just can’t fix by ourselves is loneliness.
Ecclesiastes 4:7-12- I observed yet another example of something meaningless under the sun. This is the case of a man who is all alone, without a child or a brother, yet works hard to gain as much wealth as he can. But then he asks himself, “Who am I working for? Why am I giving up so much pleasure now?” It is all so meaningless and depressing. Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.
We live in a world of connectedness-with texting, social media, the news, the world doesn’t seem quite so big and distant anymore. I personally have 1,220 friends on Facebook right now.
- This proves that if you are looking to find people, you don’t have to look hard to find them.
- However, despite having millions of people available literally at your fingertips, loneliness is rampant.
- The UK has declared loneliness an epidemic and a hazard to human health. It increases inflammation, cancer, and diabetes. One study even stated that the amount of stress hormones released from loneliness is as harmful as smoking 15 cigarettes a day! We are so designed for relationships that our bodies are dramatically affected when we don’t have them!
Lysa Terkeust recently had an apropos post on Facebook: Alone. That’s how Satan wants us. Alone with our own tangled thoughts. Alone with whispered lies that start to sound more and more and more like truths. Separated from the very people who could speak courage into our deep places flirting with discouragement and defeat. Separated from friends who could let us stand on their faith when our own gets a little shaky. The enemy knows if he can isolate us, he can intimidate us. Confuse us. Deceive us. And ultimately, make us believe that the safer paths in life are ones apart from God and our friends who serve God.
We spend a lot of time on social media. How do you spend your time? Do you compare yourself to others? Do you thrive on getting likes and comments? We live in a world of constant communication, so much that I feel we’ve lost the art of making, keeping, and deepening relationships.
- Relationships are a dime and dozen, in my opinion. I would argue that many people think relationships have basically become disposable.
I recently polled my friends to see what their biggest issues with making new friends are. The main 3 were:
- Social anxiety- this is a real thing! Please get help if this affects you. There are many people out there trained to help and would love to get you more comfortable with people.
- Awkwardness- the good news is that everyone else is awkward too! However, with all things awkward: they get better with practice. Yes, there may be bumps and bruises along the way, but the more you try the easier it will become.
- Time- This is a hard one! Sometimes you need to get creative. Finding apps that help you communicate in your own time (Marco Polo and Voxer). Be willing to get an hour less sleep a couple of times a month to meet for coffee dates. My favorite was playdates where we helped each other cook or clean. If being too busy is part of your problem, check out this episode to get a new perspective of the rest that Jesus gives us.
- I’ve decided to add one more: expectations. Expectations are ok within reason. It is not reasonable to expect people to read your mind, that there will never be conflict, or that people will feel the same way about things that you do. It is reasonable to expect to be treated with respect and to have quality time. However, you cannot expect people to read your mind. You need to communicate expectations, and I bet you will find that people are both surprised and willing to work with you!
If you want to find new or deepen existing relationships, you need to be willing to sacrifice. CS Lewis talks about Agape love in his book The Four Loves. He describes it as the unconditional “God” love that is always good in all circumstances. It is a self-sacrificing love, selfless. We need to go into all relationships being willing to give mercy, to meet others on their terms and not our own.
John 15:12-13- This is my commandment: love each other in the same way I have loved you. There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
- The original Greek word for “lay down” is tithimi. It has two meanings: to die, as Jesus died for us. The other is to set down, lay aside (as used in John 13:4 where Jesus set his garment aside to wash the disciple’s feet). We need to take our selves, our desires, and place them to the side to care for and love those friends that God has put in our life.
- We need to remember that we don’t have the power to change people. The best way to start repairing our relationships is to start on our selves. The marriage ministry re|engage calls this “staying in your circle.”
- You need to start practicing communication to understand others, not only to be understood.
Your identity is not defined by your relationships! You are not more valuable because you have a significant other. You are not defined by how much people like you. You are not more important if you have the most Facebook friends. You are not a failure if social situations are uncomfortable.
The only person that your identity lies with is the One who made you in His image, to be relational.
Ephesians 4:1-4- Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God. Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowances for each other’s faults because of your love. Make every effort to help yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace. For there is one body and one Spirit, just as you have been called to one glorious hope for the future.

Jesus: the Rest in Our Busy.

September 21, 2019 by Jenna No Comments

Bridge of the Faithful

Jesus: the Rest in Our Busy.

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We are taking a tiny detour to talk about something I have seen is constantly surfacing as a big issue: busyness. To be honest, I didn’t want to write this, I wanted to trek on in the identity series because that’s where I thought we needed to go. But God kept pushing back, trying to send me to this road instead (which I realize now is still well within the topic of identity), and I finally got the hint. This is not an episode about Sabbath or good use of our talents. It’s just to talk about being busy, why we’re busy, what we can do, and the hope that we have in Jesus when we are so tired.
As a self-respected American adult woman, there is one badge of honor we all love and love to hate. In one word we say it all: busy.
- I was the queen of busy in high school, and I am so tempted to be that way now. But when I look back at that time of running around like crazy, always thinking of the next thing to do and never the present, I realize how lonely I truly was.
A lot of things we are doing that keep us busy are good things!
- I watched Lysa TerKeurst speak on the topic “Unrush me” (you can find her book The Best Yes here), and what struck me the most was when she felt Jesus asking her “Do you love me more than these things that keep you busy?”
- What things are you holding on to just so you can put it on the altar of the god of busy? Do you love Jesus more than these? What are we willing to give up to decrease the power that busy has over us?
- Psalm 39:6-7 We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing. We heap up wealth, not knowing who will spend it. And so, Lord, where do I put my hope? My only hope is in you.
Our identity is not based on our busyness.
- In It’s All Under Control by Jennifer Dukes Lee, she echoes this by saying “Your worth is not based on your usefulness.”
Luke 10:38-40 describes two famous sisters: Mary and Martha
- While Mary chose the best option to sit and be with Jesus, Martha was “distracted by the big dinner she was preparing” (vs. 40). I am often a Martha, busying myself so much to serve Jesus that I forget to just be with him!
Sometimes we have to think like a farmer and thin our busy lives.
- I found an article on a website called Gardening Know-How that described the apple thinning process. It describes how sometimes when a tree is so fruitful, you need to thin out some of the fruit to get the big juicy “King’s fruit” in the end. This includes hard choices, like needing to choose between two good looking apples.
Satan loves when people are busy.
- It’s distracting, we forget to pray, we feel self-sufficient, and we get extremely overwhelmed when we reach our limit.
- a supersaturated solution is when a liquid, under extreme circumstances like heat, will take on more of a solute (the substance that dissolves in it) than what is naturally possible. In a hand-warmer, there is a metal disk that snaps that “just one more commitment” into the liquid. This causes an exothermic (hot) reaction and seizes up the liquid.
- We are not made to carry so many tasks, burdens, and responsibilities that if given just one more we may completely crumble.
- Studies have shown that people who take vacations live longer, have better working hearts, and surprisingly are more likely to get that promotion at work than the people who slave over the extra hours.
My dear friend Amber Payne recently passed away from complications of the rejection of her double lung transplant. However, one of the last things she did was urge us: “We don’t have to run to earn rest; we run fueled by a posture of rest.”
Jesus absolutely knows what it is to be busy and tired.
- Mark 4:38-40 describes how Jesus, after ministering to and being pursued by people all day, was so tired that he slept through a storm so violent that experienced fishermen were panicking!
- Jesus was the busiest, most needed, and had the most expectations on him of any human before or since. But He gives us multiple examples of taking time to rest. Here are just a couple:
  - Mark 1:35- Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place where he prayed.
  - Luke 5:15-16- the news about him spread all the more so that crowds of people came to hear him and be healed of their sicknesses. But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.
  - Mark 6:31-32- Then Jesus said “Let’s go off by ourselves to a quiet place and rest awhile.” He said this because there were so many people coming and going that Jesus and his apostles didn’t’ even have time to eat.
- Yes, Jesus was busy! He was also human and therefore got tired. He set an example of taking a break, resting when He knew it was needed. It’s ok to take a break! Even Jesus did, and He managed to still save the world.
The word rest is foreign to us, or we sometimes just flat out ignore it.
- I realized that some words have “rest” in it for a reason. like Rest Stop. I have often used these to take a tiny break on long or late trips, especially when I was afraid of falling asleep. Taking a break did not mean that I gave up on my journey and spent the rest of my life living at a rest stop! It gave me the energy to get back on the highway and keep going safely.
- Restroom: a glorious place where we sit for a minute (sometimes you get the luxury of doing it without tiny humans trying to get in your lap). This is a place to sit and literally “dump” the toxins out! (Yes, I did make a potty pun).
We are putting too much of our identity in the words busy and tired. These are things that we can and must change if we want to offer to God the king’s fruit of our efforts. Sometimes you need to choose between two good things so you can get best. Sometimes you’re tired and you just need a pit stop. That is not a failure! It is wisdom.
I have often felt overwhelmed when reading about the Proverbs 31 woman in the Bible. However, while doing research on the topic I found out some interesting facts.Chabad.org has a conglomeration of a multitude of articles relating to Jewish faith, practices, and teachings. While looking on this website I learned two amazing things about this passage:
- This is not a list of things that we should do, it is an acrostic poem celebrating the things that a godly woman can do! Men sing this “Eishet Chayil” (woman of valor!) song over their wives and mothers to celebrate them on the Sabbath.
- There is nothing written in these words that are meant to pressure women into doing all of the things. It is written in awe and celebration at the wonderful things a woman is capable of doing.
Sometimes we are just in seasons of life where rest does not come. But rest has been a part of the plan literally since creation. God does not expect us to be the Energizer Bunny. Nor is He disappointed when we have to say no to something that we just can’t add right now.
- He is the god of Psalm 23:2-3- He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams. He renews my strength, He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name.
Jesus is the rest in our busy. He is the strength in our weakness. We definitely have good and important work to do, but we have never been asked to do it all.
Matthew 11:28-30- Then Jesus said “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you- let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”

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Jesus: the Rest in Our Busy.

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